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Posts Tagged ‘friends’

Once again, it is Monday and I am bend over my keyboard, insistent that I will crack out a blog post. I am long giving up the hope that I will write a long sixteen hundred word post ever week from now.

Yet I can not let myself get to the point where I would not write. I am still coming to terms with that part. Is that not strange? Do I write because I love writing (and hate it and hate to love as well as love to hate; I think that’s called: “It’s complicated”).

So yes, I will write, even if you all have to sit through my rambling thought and me trying to make sense and figure out a direction of my life. Such is the way I fear. I could pretend I am a huge a know-it-all (no coughing from the peanut gallery, please!). I am not sure how far I will get tonight, but I will give it a good try.

There have a few things that have been playing on my mind. Such as what I want in a dominant. There is a loaded question if any. I am not even sure I am ready to move on, there are still so many things that tie me to my Mistress.

But at the same time I do miss that pull of control, that driving force in my life, something that defines the boundaries in which I operate in. I have spoken about this before. How the restriction of freedom could in some circumstances, especially for submissives create more personal freedom.

So time will tell. It does not help that for the first time in a long time in this, the hours that are available to me for play, serving and socialising are even more limited then they have ever been. This also limits my time very much to people by and large in Europe. At best, I have an hour in the morning and perhaps an hour or two at most at night. Sadly this leaves, as you can see, very little time for building a relationship and training.

No idea, what the future will bring. I will keep coming back to this, there are too many people I know here, too many whom I really consider close and good friends. I may not meet them ‘in the flesh’ or ‘face to face’ as the saying goes. That however is not how I entirely define friendship. It’s being there for one another, laugh, cry and share all the times that you have, both the good and the bad. I hurt when they are hurting and I am overjoyed if things are going well in their life and they are happy.

So yes, life is not all that bad. Great friends, good health, a job – what else is there to complain. Well, … yeah you know. I am going to leave this here. I was planning to write more. About what I look for in a dominant. What I find important qualities, but I think I went over that pretty much last week.

One of the things I have seemed to be talking a lot about this last week with various folks is the concept of speech training, so perhaps that I will write something more about that next week.

A lot shorter blog then I had intended or planned this week, but at least I can have some satisfaction that I have blogged. And now, with England out of the world cup of rugby, I can perhaps take a little bit more time to relax on the weekend and devote a bit more to better planning and writing and take the proper time to get a decent blog post up.

However for now, before my head hits the keyboard and this never gets posted I am going to wrap this up. Thank you all and have a wonderful week. As for the title .. well .. who does not like a quickie *grins*

 

With love, take care please and be safe
lexi

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Best laid plans, roads covered with best intentions. That seems to be my life as of late. Yes, I suppose I am feeling a little bit sorry for myself in many ways. It annoys me to know end that my energy levels are so very low and that I seem to be both missing and lacking the motivation to write and the drive to delve deeper into BDSM topics.

In essence the last few months, or rather ever since I moved house and still trying to fix things and get things squared away and sorted (why on earth do I have so much stuff!!). Just remember if you wonder why on earth I am still writing about this, think just for a moment if you will how much it irks me having to see all this in real life. 🙂 So perhaps a little bit of sympathy? Please?

On the plus side, I am making, tiny bits of progress. I am hoping to have most of the boxes squared away in some fashion by the time Christmas rolls around. I shall have people over to stay about prior to Christmas and after. Hopefully even some over New Year, which means I should at least be able to offer them a bed.

For those of my readers in the states, I do hope that you all had a wonderful Thanksgiving and then you enjoyed your time, hopefully with family and/or loved ones. It’s something that does not happen here at this side of the `pond’, although we do have the odd habbit creeping in such as “Black Friday“. I am not entirely sure if I approve of that, perhaps I shall dedicate my thoughts on that another time. Now is perhaps not the time.

It is however time for the main part of my blog! As I said, not having much inspiration and drive, forces me to look for the more light hearted content that allows me to fulfil my obligation to write. Yes, sometimes it does feel like an obligation, but on the other hand, now I am pounding away on my keyboard, listening to classical music (I always write better to classical music then say songs), I feel a certain satisfaction I am guessing. The fact that I find things to talk about, and if nothing else to write about; which gives you all a little window into my existence, drives me onwards. It’s strange how often the first five hundred words are always the hardest: Once that is done the rest often flows..

But onwards, let’s talk about Second Life Friends!

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